““There are so many things I don’t understand, and I’m just a little girl. But I know that when you love someone, you don’t give up on them. You fight for them.””
— Caitlin reflects on her understanding of love and family after her brother's death.
Archivist's Choice
Mockingbird
Kathryn Erskine (2010)
Genre
Science Fiction
Reading Time
240 min
Key Themes
See below
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An eleven-year-old girl with Asperger’s navigates grief and human connection after her brother's death, finding that healing is a journey through a world more colorful and complex than she imagined.
Synopsis
Eleven-year-old Caitlin, who has Asperger's, sees the world in stark black and white. Her older brother, Devon, always helped her understand confusing social situations. But Devon is killed in a school shooting, leaving Caitlin and her distant father struggling. Caitlin, focused on finding "closure" after learning its definition, sets out to understand her grief. Through her literal interpretation of social cues and her determination, Caitlin slowly connects with others, including a new friend, Michael, and her school counselor. She works on an Eagle Scout project Devon had started, planting a memorial tree. Through this, she learns about empathy, the nuances of human emotion, and the messy, beautiful colors of a world she once saw only in extremes. Ultimately, Caitlin finds her own way to grieve, connect with her father, and embrace life and loss.
Reading time
240 min
Difficulty
Easy
Pacing
Moderate
Mood
Heartwarming, Moving, Thought-provoking, Hopeful
✓ Read this if...
You enjoy heartfelt stories about neurodivergent characters navigating grief and growth, with a focus on emotional development and understanding.
✗ Skip this if...
You prefer fast-paced thrillers or stories without a strong emotional core.
Plot Summary
The Day Everything Changed
Eleven-year-old Caitlin, who has Asperger's syndrome, struggles to process the recent death of her older brother, Devon. Devon was her best friend, her interpreter of the confusing social world, and her protector. His death, caused by a school shooting, has left her and her father devastated. Caitlin's world, which relies on rules and clear definitions, is in chaos. She finds comfort in drawing and in her precise understanding of words, but the emotional void left by Devon is immense. Her father, consumed by his own grief, is largely unavailable, leaving Caitlin feeling even more isolated and lost in her rigid, literal interpretation of the world.
Searching for Closure
Caitlin encounters the word 'closure' during a counseling session at school. Intrigued by its definition – 'an act or process of bringing something to an end' – she sees it as a concrete goal. She believes that if she can achieve closure, the overwhelming sadness and confusion will stop. This quest becomes her main focus, giving her purpose in her otherwise disorienting world. She starts to look for ways to 'close' things, whether it's finishing a drawing or understanding an emotion, always hoping it will lessen the pain of Devon's absence.
The Shoe Box and the Tree
Caitlin decides to create a memorial for Devon, starting with a shoebox filled with his belongings and drawings. She wants to place it under a specific oak tree that Devon loved. This act is part of her understanding of closure. However, she struggles with the social aspects of this. When she tries to involve her father, he is too consumed by grief to fully engage, leaving Caitlin to navigate the emotional situation largely alone. She also has difficulty explaining her intentions to others, who do not understand her literal approach to grieving.
New Friends and Old Wounds
As Caitlin continues her search for closure, she starts to form unexpected connections. She meets Michael, a boy at school who is also struggling and understands what it is like to be an outsider. She also begins to interact more with Mrs. Brooks, her school counselor, who patiently tries to help Caitlin understand emotions and social cues. These relationships, while challenging for Caitlin, slowly broaden her perspective beyond her internal world and her focus on Devon. She starts to see that other people experience pain and confusion too.
The Meaning of Empathy
Through her interactions and observations, Caitlin begins to grasp empathy. She realizes that her father's withdrawal and sadness are not about her, but about his own pain over losing Devon. She starts to try and 'see' her father's feelings, a difficult task for someone who struggles with abstract emotions. This new understanding prompts her to try and comfort him, even if her methods are unusual. She tries to apply her structured thinking to the messy world of human emotion, with varying success.
The Recess Incident
During recess, a misunderstanding arises due to Caitlin's literal interpretation of rules and social cues. She struggles to navigate the unwritten rules of social interaction, leading to a conflict with other children. This incident highlights her challenges with social communication and the need for others to understand her unique way of processing information. Mrs. Brooks intervenes, helping to mediate the situation and explaining Caitlin's perspective to the other students and teachers, stressing the importance of patience and understanding.
The Eagle Scout Project
Caitlin learns about an Eagle Scout project by a classmate, which involves building a memorial for the victims of the school shooting, including Devon. She sees this as another path to closure, a way to honor Devon's memory in a public and structured manner. She enthusiastically offers her help, using her drawing skills and dedication to detail to contribute to the project. This involvement gives her a sense of purpose and a way to connect with her community, though still through a very literal and structured lens.
The Red Shirt
Caitlin tries to comfort her father, who is still withdrawn. She remembers Devon's favorite red shirt and decides to give it to her father, hoping it will make him feel better. This act, while simple, is a significant step for Caitlin in understanding and expressing empathy. Her father, initially distant, is touched by her gesture. This small interaction marks a turning point in their relationship, as they begin to slowly bridge the gap created by their shared grief, finding a way to connect through their love for Devon.
The Memorial Tree
With her father's help, Caitlin finally plants the memorial tree for Devon. This act is symbolic, representing a physical manifestation of her quest for closure. As they plant the tree, they share a quiet moment of connection and remembrance. This is a significant step in their healing process, as they both acknowledge their grief and begin to move forward, together. The tree becomes a living memorial, a symbol of growth and remembrance, rather than just an endpoint.
Embracing the Colors
By the end of the story, Caitlin has learned that closure is not a single event or a definitive end, but an ongoing process of healing and acceptance. She begins to understand that the world is not just black and white, good or bad, but filled with a spectrum of colors, emotions, and complexities. She learns to embrace the 'messy' parts of life, including grief, and finds new ways to connect with others. While she still has Asperger's, her journey has broadened her emotional understanding and her capacity for empathy, allowing her to navigate her world with more flexibility and connection.
Principal Figures
Caitlin
The Protagonist
Caitlin evolves from a rigid, literal thinker seeking a definitive 'closure' to someone who understands that grief is a process and that life is full of complex, 'colorful' emotions.
Devon
The Supporting/Mentor (in memory)
Though deceased, Devon's legacy continues to shape Caitlin's growth, serving as a guiding force and a source of motivation for her quest for understanding and healing.
Dad
The Supporting
He slowly emerges from his profound grief, gradually reconnecting with Caitlin and finding a way to heal alongside her.
Mrs. Brooks
The Supporting
She consistently provides a safe space and gentle guidance, helping Caitlin to slowly broaden her emotional understanding.
Michael
The Supporting
He becomes a quiet, supportive friend to Caitlin, offering a sense of belonging.
Mrs. Johnson
The Supporting
She consistently provides a supportive and accommodating learning environment for Caitlin.
Themes & Insights
Grief and Healing
The novel explores grief, especially through the eyes of someone with Asperger's. Caitlin's literal interpretation of 'closure' highlights the struggle to process abstract emotions like loss. Her father's withdrawal shows a more common, but equally difficult, form of grief. The story illustrates that healing is not a straight path or a single event, but an ongoing process involving acceptance, remembrance, and rebuilding connections. The planting of Devon's tree symbolizes a step towards healing, acknowledging loss while embracing growth.
“Closure is like a door. When you close it, you stop the wind from blowing in.”
Understanding Asperger's Syndrome
The book offers a sensitive portrayal of Asperger's syndrome, showing Caitlin's unique way of perceiving and interacting with the world. Her reliance on rules, definitions, and literal interpretations, along with her challenges with social cues and abstract concepts, are central to her character. The narrative allows readers to experience the world from her perspective, building empathy and illustrating the difficulties and strengths associated with Asperger's. It emphasizes the importance of patience, clear communication, and understanding for individuals on the autism spectrum.
“My brain works in black and white. Things are good or bad. Anything in between is confusing.”
The Power of Connection and Empathy
Despite Caitlin's difficulties with social interaction, the novel shows the important role of connection and empathy in healing and personal growth. Caitlin's journey involves learning to understand her father's grief, connecting with Michael, and accepting guidance from Mrs. Brooks. These relationships teach her to look beyond her own perspective and recognize the feelings of others. Her attempts to comfort her father, though sometimes clumsy, show a growing capacity for empathy, demonstrating that even with challenges, human connection is essential for navigating life's difficulties.
“Sometimes when you don't know what to do, you just have to do something.”
Finding Meaning and Purpose
Initially, Caitlin views the world in 'black and white,' good or bad. Her journey challenges this rigid worldview, forcing her to confront the 'colors' and complexities of human emotion and experience. She learns that grief is not simply 'bad,' but a complex mix of sadness, love, and remembrance. She discovers that people's actions are driven by a spectrum of feelings, not just clear-cut motives. This theme highlights her growth in understanding the nuances of life, moving beyond simple definitions to embrace the messy realities of the human condition.
The Spectrum of Emotion and Experience
Initially, Caitlin views the world in 'black and white,' good or bad. Her journey challenges this rigid worldview, forcing her to confront the 'colors' and complexities of human emotion and experience. She learns that grief isn't simply 'bad,' but a complex mix of sadness, love, and remembrance. She discovers that people's actions are driven by a spectrum of feelings, not just clear-cut motives. This theme highlights her growth in understanding the nuances of life, moving beyond simple definitions to embrace the beautiful and messy realities of the human condition.
“The world is full of colors. Messy and beautiful.”
Plot Devices & Literary Techniques
First-Person Narrative (Caitlin's Perspective)
The story is told entirely through Caitlin's unique point of view.
This device is crucial for understanding Caitlin's character and Asperger's syndrome. By immersing the reader in her literal, rule-bound thought processes, the narrative effectively conveys her struggles with abstract concepts, social cues, and emotional processing. It allows the reader to experience the world as she does, fostering empathy and making her journey of understanding grief and human connection particularly impactful. Her voice is distinct, honest, and often surprisingly insightful in its directness.
Symbolism of 'Closure'
Caitlin's literal interpretation of 'closure' drives her journey.
The concept of 'closure' acts as a central symbolic and literal driving force for Caitlin. For her, it's a concrete goal – an 'end' to her sadness. This literal interpretation highlights her Asperger's and her need for clear definitions. As the story progresses, the meaning of closure evolves from a simple endpoint to a complex process of acceptance and remembrance, symbolizing her growth in understanding abstract concepts and the ongoing nature of healing.
The Memorial Tree
A physical representation of Devon's memory and the healing process.
The oak tree that Caitlin and her father eventually plant for Devon serves as a powerful symbol. Initially, it's a concrete location for Caitlin's shoebox memorial, a literal place to put her grief. As it grows, it represents the ongoing nature of remembrance and the slow, organic process of healing. It signifies life continuing amidst loss, and the shared act of planting it symbolizes the father and daughter reconnecting and finding a way to move forward together while honoring Devon's memory.
Black and White vs. Color Motif
A recurring visual metaphor for Caitlin's evolving worldview.
This motif reflects Caitlin's initial rigid perception of the world ('black and white,' good or bad) and her journey towards understanding complexity and nuance ('colors'). Her artistic talent, initially focused on precise black and white drawings, gradually expands to include color as her emotional and social understanding broadens. The 'messy and beautiful' colors of the world symbolize her acceptance of life's complexities, including the mixed emotions of grief and joy, and the shades of human experience beyond simple definitions.
Critical analysis
Notable Quotes
““I think that sometimes, when things are broken, you can’t fix them. You just have to learn to live with the broken parts.””
— Caitlin grapples with the permanent loss of her brother and the changes in her family.
““Empathy is when you feel what someone else feels. And I don’t really do empathy. I do sympathy. Sympathy is when you feel bad for someone.””
— Caitlin explains her difficulty with emotional understanding due to her Asperger's.
““Sometimes, when you look at a picture, you see what you want to see. Not what’s really there.””
— Caitlin observes how people interpret situations based on their own biases.
““My dad says that sometimes, when you’re really sad, it helps to just do something. Anything. Even if it’s just making a list.””
— Caitlin's father offers advice on coping with grief and overwhelming emotions.
““I like rules. Rules make things clear. If there are no rules, then anything can happen, and anything is too much.””
— Caitlin expresses her need for structure and predictability in a chaotic world.
““A mockingbird doesn’t have its own song. It just copies other birds. But it’s still a beautiful song, isn’t it?””
— Caitlin's father uses the metaphor of a mockingbird to discuss uniqueness and imitation.
““I think maybe that’s what courage is. Not being afraid, but doing it anyway.””
— Caitlin contemplates the meaning of courage in the face of her own challenges.
““I wanted to fix everything. But some things can’t be fixed. They just have to be… understood.””
— Caitlin's realization about the limitations of her desire to repair broken things.
““Sometimes, when you’re looking for something, you find something else. Something even better.””
— Caitlin finds unexpected discoveries while searching for solutions.
““It’s like when you have a puzzle, and you lose one piece. The whole picture is still there, but it’s not complete.””
— Caitlin describes the feeling of incompleteness after her brother's death.
““I don’t know why people say ‘closure.’ It’s not like a door you can just shut. It’s more like a wound that heals, but leaves a scar.””
— Caitlin offers her perspective on the concept of closure after a traumatic event.
““Maybe the world isn’t supposed to make sense all the time. Maybe it’s okay for things to be a little messy.””
— Caitlin begins to accept the unpredictable nature of life.
““It’s hard to see things clearly when you’re looking through tears.””
— Caitlin reflects on how emotions can cloud one's judgment or perception.
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Key Questions (FAQ)
Caitlin, an eleven-year-old girl with Asperger's, struggles profoundly with the sudden death of her older brother, Devon. His absence leaves her without her primary interpreter of the world's nuances, and her father is emotionally unavailable, leaving Caitlin isolated in her grief and confusion.
About the author
Biography coming soon.
